Good Spirits!

Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you're part of a team! Everything is awesome when you're living our dream!

Sorry for the Lego Movie Song moment that just happened there. #sorrynotsorry

It's legit though! This week we moved into our super adult, super beautiful house that Michelle bought with her very own money. I'm in love and I never want to leave my room because it's beautiful. That's a true story. And there are ducks everywhere outside, which makes leaving my beautiful room worth it. Living the dream.

With a new house comes a new ward and church location and all that jazz. Today was my first time at the new ward because I was sick from chemo last week when the roomies went to church. I went to the meeting for new ward members like a good child, and when I told them that I have cancer (which nicely explained my super sexy black Audrey Hepburn hat they kept staring at), one of the men said, "Well, you seem to be in really good spirits!" And I was like, "haha, yeah I guess."

But then I realized something crazy: I actually AM in really good spirits! Which is crazy! Because really, if I think about it, my life is kind of super lame right now and I sort of hate it. I still have 2 treatments to go, I have to wait a month after my last treatment to find out if it even worked so I'm going to be an emotional mess for a month, I'm pretty much narcoleptic and sleep all the freaking time, and I more closely resemble a potato than a real person. Not exactly the best time of my life, but screw it. Because today I'm happy. 

Today is AMAZING. Today I'm just, like, giggling-to-myself-for-no-real-reason happy. Today I feel strong and I can do anything. Today I feel beautiful. Do you know how long it's been since I felt beautiful?!? Today I am excited for the future. EXCITED. I'm excited to see what happens and what doesn't and how life is going to work out! I don't even remember the last time I was excited about the future! Mostly I've just been worried and scared - but not today. Today I'm just stoked out of my mind because life is freaking wonderful! Today I'm smiling because my new ward seems awesome, because a cute guy helped me find Jupiter last night, because my makeup was on point today, because ducks crossed the road in front of my car this morning, and because of so many other silly, little, ridiculous reasons. It's a great feeling. And I know that this excitement and this little emotional high I have going on has an expiration date because I have chemo on Friday, but that makes it even more special because I realize how rare it is. It doesn't even matter why I'm happy - It just means so much to remember that I am even capable of feeling this happy. I'm really good at smiling for people and I laugh all the time, but how long has it been since I've laughed and smiled when I'm alone, just because I'm honestly feeling it? Way too long. 

Anyway, I just wanted to document this happy day so I can look back on it when I'm feeling like a lumpy little potato on the couch. I'm going camping this week and I'm going to look at so many stars and write my novel and sketch and just generally love my life. See ya later, gater!

And just in case you missed it, here's my super-not-redneck chemo hair from last week.